Gather round, everyone. It’s time to have “The Talk.”

You know the one I mean. You’ve started asking lots of questions and I can tell you’re ready for it, so make yourselves comfortable and let’s go over the basics.

Because if you’re in business, you need to know about this. It’s crucial to your success. Mastering this technique will put a spring in your step, and bring new life to your ventures.

Plus, it’s actually pretty fun.

Birds do it, bees do it

The birds and the bees do this naturally, and we can, too. It’s called cross-pollination.

They fly from one flower to another, or one tree to the next, picking up bits of one plant and carrying it to the other.

The plant on the receiving end of this pollination is hardier and able to reproduce with greater variety. It meets environmental challenges more successfully because it’s genetically diverse.

In the same way, when you cross-pollinate ideas, you make your business stronger. You’ll be better able to weather the difficulties that every business and brand has to face to survive.

Keeping your eyes open to sources for ideas is the first step. Having a system for gathering and using these ideas is important, too. Really great ideas can be found where you least expect them.

Get started here

First, the obvious sources. Cross-pollinate your business with innovative new ideas by:

• Reading books, magazines and websites outside your field.
• Talking to people in different industries. Find out what their challenges are and how they’ve met them. Ask yourself how you can apply their solutions to your own business.
• Learning from your customers. Design thinking is a concept that is built around staying in close touch with your customers’ needs, and building your products and services around meeting them.

Look for love in all the wrong places

You can find great new ideas in places you never expected, too.

• Get inspiration from your fiercest competition. Your competitors are fighting the same battles you are. What are they doing that you can learn from? How have they solved the same challenges you face? What techniques do they use to succeed? What are some problems they don’t solve particularly well, where you could fill in the gap?
• Learn from your own failures. The School of Hard Knocks can teach you more than anything else. Look back on your projects and learn from what went wrong, so that you can get it right the next time.

Keep the innovative ideas flowing

Finally, it’s easier to keep the new ideas flowing in to your business if you have a structure in place that allows cross-pollination to happen on a regular basis. Here are some techniques:

• Create an informal Board of Directors.. Gather a group of 3-5 people who are willing to support your efforts. Meet with them in person or by phone at least four times a year. Update them on your goals, the progress you’re making, and your struggles. Let the ideas flow, and take good notes.
• Join a Mastermind group. Many groups meet monthly, some more often. Some Chamber of Commerce organizations coordinate them, but you can also find virtual Mastermind groups with a quick web search. The group supports each member, so you’ll both offer and receive encouragement and ideas.
• Join a virtual private community. Sites like Third Tribe are great places to connect with like-minded people and to generate exciting new business ideas.
• Consider working with a coach. Because business coaches speak to many different clients, they’ll naturally cross pollinate your conversations with ideas they’ve picked up from helping other people.

Small business, big ideas

We all want a more resilient business, and a lot of Copyblogger readers have very small organizations. Letting ideas flow freely between your small-scale operation and the larger world will build a business that withstands the challenges of the marketplace.

How about you? Are you gathering and applying ideas from all over? Buzz down to the comments and cross-pollinate them with some thoughts of your own.

About the Author: Pamela Wilson has been in the same Mastermind group since 2004. She cross pollinates her Big Brand System site with ideas to help small businesses use the power of design to grow.

Dave Navarro wrote recently that worrying about what you’re doing (or not doing) is the surest way to keep you poor and unsuccessful.

It’s a cracking article with a heap of good points, one of them being that the key difference in the way successful people operate is that they see failure as an integral part of the process of achieving success.

That’s true. Unless you plan on spending all your time underneath your duvet, failure is in your destiny. Trying to minimize or avoid failure will not help you be successful.

But here’s the thing. Trying to be successful will not help you actually become successful, either.

The problem with success

You’re probably here because you want to be a successful person. You want the material and emotional benefits that come with that.

That’s awesome and I want it to happen for you. But while there’s nothing wrong with success, there are five important reasons why success for its own sake is the wrong focus:

1. Success is a moving target

Be honest, what’s success for you?

• Is it about launching a product and having people buy it?
• Is it about having respect from your peers and mentors?
• Is it about doing what you love so you can care for your family?

Too many people don’t create their own definition of success. They chase an idea they’ve patched together from what they’ve read, observed, or think they should be aiming for.

Do you know the feeling of not being wholly convinced that you’re pursuing the right success for you, but you’ve carried on regardless? That’s not how real success is achieved. Because even if you’re outwardly successful, you’ll feel disconnected from it. Achieving the wrong kind of success will always feel hollow.

2. Success is the wrong motivator

It’s too often based on extrinsic factors — the things you believe success can deliver.

Whether it’s physical goods, the feeling that you’ve “made it,” or thinking you’ll be free of worry and stress, these are all externalized projections about what a successful lifestyle will bring you.

When you make decisions based on an external motivator, it’s much easier to second-guess yourself. Motivation that comes from within is much more grounded and more powerful.

3. Success isn’t here, now

If you’re working hard to make something happen, it’s easy to dream about the moment you become successful. We all tend to fantastize about that big pay-off for all our hard work.

That kind of success is always elusively around the next bend. Just a few more weeks or months away. Just a bit more work, and you’ll finally be successful.

But what about now? What’s stopping you from feeling like a success right now, this very moment? Waiting for success in the future takes you out of the game in the present.

4. Success does not eliminate worry or fear

Being successful does not change how your brain works.

Success often increases worry and fear, as you question how you can repeat it or worry about losing it.

What eliminates worry and fear is shifting the patterns of thinking that result in self-doubt and second-guessing.

5. Success is limited by confidence

Perhaps most important, any success you might experience is limited by your self-confidence.

If success is achieved by taking repeated, meaningful action, then what happens if you’re not confident enough to take the actions that scare the crap out of you?

What will you do when things go wrong? Without confidence, you’ll be more inclined to retreat, beat yourself up, and reinforce a negative self-image. Nasty.

Placing your efforts on being a “successful person” is putting energy into the wrong place. It’s allowing in the complications I’ve listed above (and there are more that I haven’t listed) and ignoring how you’re thinking about what you’re doing and how you’re doing it right now.

Instead, what I’m suggesting is that you place your focus squarely on becoming a confident person, rather than a successful one.

To borrow from Dave’s article:

Success is not a person. It’s an event.

Shift your thinking from being a successful person to a confident one, and you’ll experience more success events and more failure events, both of which have abundant rewards. Here’s how to do it, right now.

Engage, today

I’m always banging on about playing a game that matters, for the simple reason that it forces you to deeply engage with something that has personal meaning. It aligns your efforts with what matters to you and ensures that you’re intrinsically motivated to play to the best of your ability.

If you want to be the best tennis player you can be, it will only really happen if you get enjoyment from the act of playing tennis. Start off with the aim of winning a shiny cup and you’re setting yourself up for struggle and second-guessing.

Forget the rules, just play

Rolling around in your head are expectations about what you can and can’t do, should and shouldn’t do, must and mustn’t do. Then you add in all the expectations you have about other people.

And most brain-numbing of all, you have expectations about what other people expect of you.

Forget all of that and just play. The best tennis players aren’t darting around the court thinking about how they should play the game. They use natural ability and learned skills and strategies to play to their best level.

Take confident action

Confident action is about making deliberate choices.

Confident action is using your values, strengths, and talents to support your decisions and the actions that follow.

Confident action is trusting yourself to make the next decision, no matter how this one turns out.

Listen to the voices

Those voices in your head can be confusing, but you need to listen to them (unless they’re telling you to set fire to the town hall), because that’s the only way to recognize what’s real and what’s imagined.

You don’t want to let those voices control your thinking, or you’ll be running in circles forever. But you do want to start paying attention to them, noticing the difference between the voice of fear and one of your best assets, your intuiton.

It’s by acknowledging what goes on in your head that you learn about what serves you well and what holds you back. You learn the voice of imagined fear, you learn the voice of solid doubt (and can take appropriate action in response to those risks), and you learn the still, quiet voice of intuition that will always tell you what you need to know.

Decide what’s important

Don’t shoot the messenger, but things will go wrong and you will screw up.

The good news is that you always get to choose how you think about what goes wrong. A screw-up is only a big deal if you decide it is. By looking at it in a different way, there’s no need to retreat or beat yourself up.

Plus, simply because you’re intrinsically motivated by playing a game that matters, the idea of “failure” has far less power than if you’re extrinsically motivated, and sometimes the power of “failure” disappears completely. You get to decide what’s important.

The real difference that makes success happen

Don’t think in terms of successful people or unsuccessul people. We all experience success and failure throughout our lives — remember, success and failure are not people, they’re events.

People experience success because they’ve achieved a level of natural self-confidence that allows them to take meaningful action.

They’ve achieved a level of natural self-confidence that allows them to trust their behavior, rather than focusing on the outcome of that behavior.

I want to know what you think. How do you see confidence and success? Let us know in the comments.

About the Author: As a leading confidence coach with clients around the world, Steve Errey has a reputation for talking sense and getting results. Get more from him at The Confidence Guy.

I’m flying to Portland, Oregon today to meet up with Paul Colligan. He’s going to walk me through the tech & biz of setting up a podcast.

My plan is to learn everything I need to know to set up a profitable, successful podcast in ONE day.

I expect to learn a lot. Of course I’ll be sharing that with you too. And you won’t even have to make a cross-country trip.

On my flight over, I’m reading a great new report. It’s free, and you’re going to love it! I’ll share the details with you as soon as I’m done with it…

Talk soon!

p.s. If you have a podcast, I’d love to hear your biggest challenges and/or your story. And if you’re interested in podcasting, what questions do you have about getting started?

(written & published on my Motorola Droid)

I recently put out the word that I wanted to interview small business owners for an upcoming project, the Empire Building Kit.

These were the criteria: you had to net at least $50,000 a year with two or fewer employees, you had to be willing to talk about money in specific terms, you had to share your biggest mistakes as well as your greatest successes, and you couldn’t be a professional blogger.

(Obviously there’s nothing wrong with professional blogging — I just figure that bloggers get enough attention already. Besides, if you want to create a business, there are much easier models.)

I heard back from 300 people with all kinds of different backgrounds, but Lisa’s email stood out from the rest.

I have a dog-walking business in Minnesota. Can I contribute my story?

I’ll be honest: I didn’t think much of it at first. A dog-walker? Shouldn’t we be talking about affiliate marketing, information products, and Facebook ads?

Walking dogs around the park for cash isn’t really my thing, so I assumed I’d say no.

But then Lisa told me how much money she makes: $88,342 in 2009, and now on track for $105,000 in 2010.

That got my attention. She makes six figures as a dog-walker? Wow. Now that’s a story.

And in marketing, of course, story is everything. If you can build a real business around something you’re passionate about — in this case, Lisa loves dogs — I think that’s worth some attention.

Follow your passion? Yes . . . sort of

The thing about following your passion to the bank isn’t so much overrated as it is incomplete.

Finding a way to get paid for doing what you love is both feasible and sustainable. The trick is to construct a lifestyle business around something you’re passionate about that other people are willing to spend money on.

The difference is crucial: I can be passionate about eating pizza and playing video games, but so far I haven’t found anyone willing to pay me for it. Therefore, I have to orient my business not only around my own interests, but also around what other people are willing to pay for.

I built the rest of the Empire Building Kit around conversations and insights from people like Lisa. The photographer, the triathlon coach, the translator, the guy who makes baseball art, the murder mystery host, and so on.

You’ve probably never heard of most of them, but they’re doing very well doing something they love.

Last month I released the product on board a 44-hour Empire Builder train from Chicago to Portland. It was a huge success, with rave reviews from our inaugural group of emperors — and a freaked out merchant account that wanted to know why so many sales were rolling in.

Long story short, today I’m doing it again. It’s for 24-hours only, before I get on a plane and head overseas as part of my quest to visit every country in the world. If you’re interested in joining the inaugural group of new emperors, I’d love to have you on board.

All the details

The goal of the Empire Building Kit is to help people build a business in one year by doing one thing every day.

To that end, I’ve compiled a truckload of resources and hand-holding to make sure that happens. The Kit includes:

15+ Case Studies. From 300 initial respondents, I narrowed it down to more than 15 thriving emperors from at least as many different backgrounds. I asked for their stories, their secrets, what they wish they had known before they started.

The case studies come in a variety of formats: video interviews, MP3 files, PDFs, with complete transcripts. So you can get the most out of them no matter what your learning style.

365-step Email Series. You get one mini-lesson today, one tomorrow, and 363 more over the rest of the next year.

According to the folks at Aweber, it’s officially the longest follow-up series in their history. The key is: if you do one thing a day, it will be much easier than trying to do everything at once. But you also have to make sure you’re doing the right things, so we help with that too.

A 52-step Product Launch checklist. Even if you’re not launching from the “bloggers’ lounge” onboard an Amtrak train, something always goes wrong with a product launch.

Use this checklist to avoid big mistakes, and dramatically increase revenue. One step produces an average revenue increase of 30% every launch, no matter the price of the product. Another step ensures you can sleep at night by not screwing up the confirmation emails. And so on.

“Show Me the Money” module. All the details from behind the scenes of my own Unconventional Guides business. You’ll learn how much money each product brings in, where I’ve screwed up, where I hit it big, and so on.

Ok, so I could go on about all of that for a while. But what you really get is insight and context from people who have successfully cracked the code of following your passion. They all talk about money, they are all extremely candid, and they’re all real people doing fun things while getting paid.

Care to join Lisa and the rest of us? You can find out all about it right here, but it’s only available for 24 hours, ending Wednesday morning at 9am Pacific Time.

And if it’s not a good fit for you, of course, that’s fine too. Most importantly, I hope your business is as enjoyable as Lisa’s — and as enjoyable as mine.

About the Author: Chris Guillebeau travels the world and writes for a small army of remarkable people at chrisguillebeau.com. Follow his live updates from every country in the world at twitter.com/chrisguillebeau.

There’s a wonderful European-style market and bakery in the Oak Lawn area of Dallas. They serve everything from made-to-order salads and sandwiches to chef-prepared, ready-to-eat meals.

But what I love most about the place is the sign on the door when you leave. It’s classic.

The sign doesn’t read “Please Come Again” or “Thank You for Your Business” or some other typical exit sign platitude.

It says . . .

“See you tomorrow.”

That kind of confidence is compelling and downright sexy. Sure, a fantastic product, service, or experience is the starting point from which confidence comes, but too many people play it scared and safe even when what they offer is truly great.

I’m not talking about arrogance. Arrogance is an indication of fear, not assurance.

Too many people, however, approach copywriting from a defensive mindset. You’re already back on your heels from the start, instead of proudly sharing your excellence with the people who can benefit most from it.

After all, if you’re not confident in your product or service, why should anyone else be? Confidence is a strong attractor because it assures people they’re making the right choice.

So, check out these tips for confident writing.

And we’ll see you tomorrow.

About the Author: Brian Clark is founder of Copyblogger and wants you to know that Thesis + Scribe = SEO Made Simple. Get more from Brian on Twitter.

Want lots more tips for producing confident copy and content? Sign up for the Copyblogger newsletter. It’s free, and it’s the smartest way to get the very best advice about how to effectively market online.

If you want the best network marketing books, then you’ll want to print a copy of this list. These are the most wished for books on Amazon. This means there is probably a book or two on this list your network marketing team would love.

As bloggers, we put a lot of effort into telling our readers how to do things.

We believe that if we can just give them enough informative content that they’ll subscribe to our blog and never leave. We try to become the best teacher we possibly can, instilling wisdom down into short, usable posts that our readers can put into action right away.

But what if that’s not what they really want?

What if they don’t want a teacher to tell them what to do?

What if all they’re looking for is a warm and understanding person who understands what they’re going through and is willing to love them, no matter what?

Someone like (you guessed it) Mr. Rogers.

Do you care how they feel?

Being a kid can be tough.

Everyone is always telling you to be quiet. No one wants to listen to what you think. Your parents make you go to bed, just when all of the fun is starting.

But not Mr. Rogers.

Fred Rogers made you feel like it was just you and him hanging out. He respected what you thought. He loved you, not because he had to (like your parents), but because he genuinely believed you were special.

After a while, you believed him. You felt special. You came back to the TV, day after day, just so you could feel that way again.

The best bloggers do that too. I read Copyblogger everyday for years before submitting this guest post, and it wasn’t just the information that kept me coming back. It was because, when I was done reading, it made me feel smarter, like I was one of the few people on the web who was truly in the know.

The more I think about it, the more I believe that’s a part of our job. Our job is bloggers isn’t just to inform our readers, but to make them feel special.

And yes, I realize it’s a little hokey, but I think Mr. Rogers can show us how. Listen to some of these quotes:

Lesson: For your audience to love you, first you have to love them. And they have to know it.

You know, I think everybody longs to be loved, and longs to know that he or she is lovable. And, consequently, the greatest thing that we can do is to help somebody know that they’re loved and capable of loving.

How much do you care about your readers? I mean, really care?

Mr. Rogers didn’t just talk to children on television. He also visited them in person. On a regular basis, he would go out into public and ask kids about themselves. He would bend down and look little boys and girls straight in the eyes, so they knew he was fully focused on them. Then they poured their hearts out to him right on the spot.

No, he wasn’t compensated for that time, and neither are we. Most popular bloggers spend inordinate amounts of time reading every comment, responding to every email, and watching what people say on Twitter. None of this has any direct effect on traffic, but what it does is build goodwill. One at a time, your subscribers find out that you really care, and it transforms them from readers into raving fans.

Lesson: Before you can be a leader, first you have to be a neighbor.

Our world hangs like a magnificent jewel in the vastness of space. Every one of us is a part of that jewel. A facet of that jewel. And in the perspective of infinity, our differences are infinitesimal.

Mr. Rogers didn’t pretend to be better than the children who watched his show. He didn’t point out how young and ignorant they were. He didn’t appoint himself as an expert and command them to listen.

Instead, he decided to be their neighbor: someone just like them, who knew what they were going through, and was ready to help in any way he could, not because they were defenseless children, but because that’s what good neighbors do.

The same is true for bloggers. If you really want your audience to listen to you, you need to take the time to tell them your story, pointing out the ways you’re similar to them and inspiring them through your example.

Lesson: Create an environment where it’s okay to be imperfect.

I like you just the way you are.

Most kids are terrified, not just of getting caught with their hand in the cookie jar or their parents finding a bad grade on their report card, but of the possibility that they’ll do something so bad that their family will stop loving them. They believe that love is only for “good” children, and they worry that they don’t deserve it.

This quote was Mr. Rogers’ gentle way of correcting (and comforting) them. Over and over again, he would tell them that, “I like you just the way you are,” not just because it sounded good, but because it was what they needed to hear. They needed to know that love wasn’t conditional, and that they were safe enough around him to make mistakes and learn how to improve.

I believe it’s important for us to create the same environment for our readers. You may not realize it, but lots of your readers are probably intimidated by you, believing that they can never be as good as you are, and they’re afraid to reach out to you for help.

It’s important to remind them that you like them just the way they are. Maybe you don’t have to tell them as often as Mr. Rogers, but take a moment every few weeks to mention how impressed you are with the creative ways they’ve implemented your suggestions and how are honored you are to have them as readers.

It’s a small thing, but it matters.

Lesson: Keep what works, throw out what doesn’t, but always know what and why.

Propel, propel, propel your craft softly down liquid solution. Ecstatically, ecstatically, ecstatically, ecstatically, existence is simply illusion.

Every day, Mr. Rogers honed his craft, paying attention to even the smallest of details.

One time, he asked a fellow actor to say “the dog is going back home” instead of “the dog is going back to his owner.” He didn’t like the word owner because it was too possessive for the children viewers.

He also stuck with what worked. “Won’t you be my neighbor?” wasn’t just the theme song for the show; it was a way to set the tone at the beginning of every episode, getting children ready to listen. And so he repeated it, show after show for years.

It’s our responsibility as bloggers to hone our craft in the same way. You should experiment, not just with headlines or post ideas, but with new openings, new closes, new pictures, and even new words. It’s how you improve.

And at the same time, take a lesson from Fred Rogers and don’t be afraid to repeat what works.

Lesson: Seize your opportunity

When will your opportunity be?

Every day that communicate from the heart, you have a chance to change the world.

Back in 1969, Nixon proposed cuts to PBS, leading the Senate to hold a hearing that would decide the future of the station. And who do you think appeared before them and melted their hearts with words?

Mr. Rogers.

He wasn’t the CEO. He wasn’t a Washington insider. He wasn’t even well-known to the committee. Yet he showed up, spoke from the heart, and transformed some of the toughest, most hardened politicians in the country into raving fans.

It was the opportunity to create change that many of us dream of, and he seized it. But here’s the real question:

When will your opportunity be?

Watch this video, and think about it. Because when it comes, we’ll be counting on you.

About the Author: Karl Staib writes about building stronger relationships and being happy at work: Work Happy Now! If you enjoyed this article, you may like to subscribe to his feed, follow him on Twitter, or read one of his most popular articles: How to Write a Career List.

In less than 2 weeks, SocialFresh is coming to Nashville TN for their first event in 2010.

It is a one-day event on January 11th with a a pre-party the night before the event, and an after party the night of the event.

I am attending the event, and will be at both of the before & after get-togethers. From what I hear, there are still seats available – and I found a coupon code for you if you’re interested in going.

The list of speakers includes Jason Falls and Lisa Hoffman, among many others, and topics include: The Future of Connectivity, Real Twitter Results, Word of Mouth Marketing, Corporate Blogging and more.

You can get all the details at: SocialFresh Nashville

And try this coupon code: video44 – it worked for me!

Best,

p.s. If you are planning to attend SocialFresh Nashville, leave me a note below. I’d love to meet up with you at the event!

Dislosure: I purchased a ticket at full price (minus discount from the code) and became an affiliate for SocialFresh as well.

A lot of people think that social media is a trend. A fad to fade. Or at least that was the whisper up until this last year… when it became obvious that social media was here to stay.

There’s a lot more to social media than collecting friends and promoting your blog posts or products. Social media is changing the way we do business, and the way we live.

See this quick 4+ minute video by Erik Qualman discussing whether social media is a fad – or the biggest shift since the industrial revolution…

I picked up a copy of Socialnomics by Erik Qualman (aka @equalman on Twitter) last month, and have been reading it off and on for the last few weeks. I’d love to just sit down and read it all the way through in one sitting, but it’s been a busy month so I’ve been absorbing half a chapter here and there every chance I got.

You can get Socialnomics on audible, get it for the Kindle, or you can get a hardcover copy at Amazon for only $16.47. It comes in just about every flavor you could want. It has a 5-star rating on Amazon, with all but one review giving it 5 full stars.

(I still prefer to curl up with a good hardcover book)

Fresh, Engaging… and Thought-Provoking

There’s something super cool about a book so fresh that it references things that just happened earlier this year, and change that is happening right now.

Erik puts it all in context in the first 3 chapters and explains how social media is not a “time suck” or an insane distraction – as some of us initially thought, myself included – but rather a more efficient and deeper way to communicate.

I found myself nodding along the whole way, and really seeing the bigger picture – outside of online business and internet marketing. How social media is changing the way we talk, shop, learn, share… and even vote.

I can say firsthand that social media has changed my relationships with my friends, my children and even my mother. We still talk on the phone or sit down to dinner together, but it’s no longer a conversation of “how was your day?” or “what’s new in your life?” – because we already know.

Even if you barely know me on a personal level you probably know that my house got rolled on Halloween, I just bought a 4WD Jeep (and what color it was), that I have a good sense of humor , I’ve been reading Socialnomics, etc.

So what, right? The big argument has been… who cares what everyone else is doing, and how can I possibly keep up with everyone else’s life and their daily updates?

You don’t necessarily. Care or keep up, that is – or not with everyone at least, and not every minute. But you can filter updates by relationship, check in any time any day and see what your friends and family are up to via their profiles & update streams, or do a 2-second search to find specific conversations.

There’s a sense of transparency about social media that opens a million doors. Not just for marketing purposes, but for communication and relationships.

My stepdaughter knew that I was out dancing with her English teacher (oops!), I know who my teens are dating or talking to, and relatives who live far away get a daily glimpse into our lives without the hour-long phone calls every week.

“It’s not a 9-to-5 world, it’s a 24/7 world.”

In Chapter 3 Erik discusses “the fluid schedule” and finding balance between gadgets, updates and real life. While some may feel this makes you less connected and less productive, it’s actually exactly opposite.

You no longer have to sit in front of the television for an entire hour twice a day to get the news. You can select what type of news you want, and have it delivered to you instantly the minute the story breaks.

You no longer have to research products online for hours – you can get recommendations and links to peer reviews in a matter of minutes.

You no longer have to go it alone. You have the entire world at your fingertips – no matter where you are, no matter what time of day it is.

Social Media Marketing: Embracing The Change

I’ve really enjoyed Socialnomics from a personal perspective, but it also addresses brand marketing and social media success stories. Erik gives very specific examples of social media campaigns – and why they worked (or flopped).

How do you get loyal raving fans, and get them to talk about your brand online? That’s exactly what you’ll learn. “Consumers are taking ownership of brands, and their referral power is priceless.” (page 97)

Traditional marketing methods simply don’t work in the social media space. And in addition to changing the message and the method, there’s a whole new world of possibilities available thanks to this changing landscape. Be sure to check out what Erik has to say about Ebooks in Chapter 5…

The entire book is chock full of thought-provoking idea generators, from how to harness the power of the growing social media graph… to integrating advertising and monetization seamlessly into your content.

Socialnomics is fresh, current, and a must-read for anyone marketing anything online – less than 20 bucks, and definitely a smart investment in your business and your social media marketing plan (especially if you don’t yet have one!).

My opinion? You’re going to LOVE this book.

If you’ve been feeling out of the loop, or frustrated by social media options and opportunities that you don’t really understand, sit down with a copy of Socialnomics and enjoy the ride… You’ll be up to speed in no time.

Best,

p.s. You can read editorial reviews and consumer reviews on Amazon.com, and also flip through several pages of the book using their Look Inside! feature.

Grab a copy for yourself, and make sure you subscribe to the Internet Marketing This Week podcast as we’ll have Erik Qualman on as a special guest next week.

Another video by Erik, on the ROI of Social Media Marketing… Enjoy!

You know that “inner child” we hear so much about — the one that’s supposedly deep inside of all of us?

Well, I live with it. As a matter of fact, I call him “Austin.”

In the five years I’ve been a parent, I’ve realized that the notion of the inner child is more than just a neat psychological construct. It’s very nearly a literal thing. As we grow up, we don’t change so much as drape layer after complicated layer of adult emotion on top of that inner child. The child doesn’t vanish; he just gets obscured and filtered.

You don’t get an evolved, new mature being. You get Austin with fifteen blankets over his head.

Because that kid always remains at our core (and if you’ve ever caught yourself playing kids’ games with genuine enjoyment, you know that it does), our base motivations remain as well. They just get a little harder to see.

Kids ask for love; adults have complicated passive-aggressive relationships. Kids eat what tastes good; adults want the cupcake, but worry about it going straight to their thighs.

So you want to learn about marketing? Well, despite the complicated models and terminology that some of the gurus use, it’s actually quite simple. To see what works and why, all you have to do is look to my boy.

Make the customer “want that”

When the TV is on in our house, there are sometimes twelve sequential minutes of relative quiet. Then, as the commercials come on, we get a loud play-by-play as Austin begins talking loudly to nobody:

“I want that.”

“I don’t want that.”

“I want that. That last thing. Not that; the thing before.”

It’s easy to dismiss this as incredibly annoying, but if you think about it, it’s actually really revealing.

(OK, it’s incredibly annoying too.)

Without all of those complex adult filters, kids are a conduit to something we don’t normally allow in the adult world: pure desire. There are none of the shoulds and should nots, no rationalizations and thoughts of what is proper or responsible.

That kid is still inside everyone. So the dead-simple lesson is this: Every sale starts with pure desire. Customers either “want that” or they don’t. The rest is just mental gymnastics to justify that core emotion.

Know what your customer really wants

Recently, Austin stormed through a six pack of kids’ yogurt so that we’d buy more, because each six pack had a tiny, ridiculous comic book inside. Yoplait could have filled those containers with shredded paper and they still would have gotten our dollars if Austin had his way.

Did he want the yogurt? Not so much. He wanted the comic book.

Similarly, we sometimes go to McDonald’s because of the dumb little toys they stick in Happy Meals. Or because of the giant playlands they have everywhere.

I have this experiment I keep meaning to try: I want to tell Austin that McDonald’s serves food, because I think he may be surprised to learn it. We don’t go to McDonald’s for the food. We go for the Batmobile that fires a small plastic stick at the back of my head while I’m driving.

Now . . . Wendy’s? We don’t go to Wendy’s. Their kids’ meal prizes are audiobooks on CD. Bleh. Same basic food, but none of what the boy really wants.

Interestingly, as I write this, I’m sitting at a Borders book store. There’s also a Barnes & Noble in town, but they don’t have as many big poofy chairs to sit in, and their ambient music is too loud. Apparently both stores have the same books, but I wouldn’t know that because I just come here to buy a latte and work in a comfortable chair.

Don’t lie to your customers

Cheers to McDonald’s for recognizing that small toys will get kids in the door. But jeers to our local managers for failing the “implied contract with the customer” test.

Recently, my wife and I were assaulted by a barrage of McDonald’s requests because the current pieces of plastic junk that the clerks were dropping into Happy Meals were Bakugan figures, which are Japanese balls that transform into things. (Don’t ask.)

My wife took Austin once and he returned angry, showing me a nondescript plastic Pancho Villa-like figure with a spinning sombrero. Later, I took him and despite the display for Bakugan, we again walked away with a bogus replacement — a miniature stuffed monkey.

Twice burned, Austin’s McDonald’s lust backed off significantly. And, seeing as our son had been lied to twice, my wife and I instituted a temporary boycott.

Associative conditioning works

We often buy SpongeBob SquarePants macaroni and cheese. It’s terrible. For some reason, a complicated spongelike lattice doesn’t present cheese and pasta in a pleasing ratio. And yet Austin eats it and requests it again and again because SpongeBob is on the box.

I tested the limits of this adoration yesterday over dinner. Austin hates lettuce more than anything in the world, so I asked him if he would eat lettuce that had SpongeBob printed on the leaves and came with a free coloring book. He was all over it.

Then he got mad at me when I told him that such lettuce didn’t exist.

Of course, this only works on small children. Only kids are dumb enough to fall for such a simple trick, right?

Um, not quite. Most advertising is based around associative conditioning, which is taking something that you already like and pairing it with something that they want you to like. Or with someone you already like, in the form of a celebrity (or sponge) endorsement.

You may not buy terrible macaroni because a cartoon tells you to, but you buy Nikes because LeBron James endorses them. Or you buy a phone you can’t actually talk on because it’s white with a silver Apple on it. And if you don’t do those things, then I’ll bet you were buying Pepsi because of Michael Jackson back before they lit his hair on fire.

You may be standing up and denying angrily that you do any of those things, but billions of advertiser dollars say either that you’re quite unique or that you’re mistaken. Maybe you don’t come out and say, “Ooh, Tiger Woods. I want that!” but it happens anyway — deep down, at the inner child level.

Like so many things, marketing can appear way more complicated than it is. But marketing is simple — not always easy, but simple. In fact, it’s so simple that you may be overlooking the reasons it works when it does, and why it doesn’t work when it fails.

If you have kids, look to them. See what they like, and why they like it. See what pushes their buttons, because it’ll tell you a ton. Kids aren’t dumb. They’re just adults without all of those complicated outer layers.

About the Author: Johnny B. Truant is giving a free teleclass called Attract Clients, Lose the Stress, and Do What You Love tomorrow (November 12, 2009) with his marketing veteran mother. She knows Johnny’s inner child better than he does, because she lived with it for eighteen years.